My 9/11 story doesn’t begin at 8:46 on Tuesday morning, it actually begins two months prior – I happened to be IN New York on June 11, 2001, exactly 2 months before the attacks that challenged so much of what we believe in as Americans.
I was there with my youth choir from church, sang at the bottom of those towers, and passed out bibles with my classmates as people took lunch breaks and walked back in to their offices at a site that would cease to exist only two short months later.
On Tuesday morning, September 11, 2001, I had on jeans and a yellow short sleeve cotton shirt with Doc Marten sandals. A friend of mine was wearing her shirt with the NY skyline (obviously, still including the Twin Towers). On September 11, my brother got his acceptance letter to Baylor, and my best friend turned 16.
I remember the hushed whispers and quick chatter of everyone around me in the hallway as I walked to my second period class. It was during this time that I learned that some plane had crashed into one of the twin towers. That was all we knew at that point, but it still seemed like I was walking through a bad dream, like something just wasn’t right. Even if nothing else had happened that day, the “tragic accident” would have left hundreds dead and so many lives changed.
Seeing that the crash appeared to be an unexplained accident and it hadn’t been defined as a terrorist attack yet, my second period Art teacher wasn’t very keen on allowing us to be glued to the TVs or internet as other classes already were. It was a pretty laid back class with a pretty fun teacher so it was common for people to come in and visit, and this day was no different. But the person that came in to visit on this particular day brought us the information that the 2nd tower had been hit – we knew at this point that the earlier crash was deliberate and we began to watch as the rest of the events of the day unfolded.
The rest of the day seems like on big blur – each class was different. Some teachers didn’t want us listening to the news, but allowed us to have a free period (meaning no work). Other teachers wanted us to work straight through the period. Some teachers allowed us to talk about the things we’d seen and heard and watch footage of the news as it was broadcast. I’m thankful and understanding of EACH of the responses, I know each person had their own reasoning and were trying to protect our hearts and minds in their own ways.
On Wednesday evening, our church cancelled the regularly scheduled events and held a candlelight service where we sang and reflected on the horrible events and prayed for those that were injured, those that lost loved ones, and the future of our country. I remember finding such hope and peace that evening as I looked across the auditorium and saw the beauty of a community (and a nation) coming together.
I remember going to choir on the Sunday evening following the attacks and watching our director, Fred Randles, as he wept over the lives that were lost. But what I remember most was the hope that he gave us that night as he reminded us that it was very possible the same bibles we had passed out two months before were in the desks of men and women who had been killed in the attacks. That’s what we had gone for, to be a light for Jesus in a lost world, and I prayed with all of my heart that we had made a difference in someone’s life that had been taken on that day.
At the foot of those towers, and every other site we sang at during my four years in the youth choir, we sang a song called “Forever.” It is a song I sung hundreds of times over those four years (you should experience a Fred Randles rehearsal!!) and have sang a hundred times since then. I can still do the motions, step-by-step, and remember holding our hands up at the end until hearing the snap to let us know we could lower our hands.
To be honest, the song wasn’t one of my favorites and I was always ready for it to be over, but as I listen to that song today, I get chills! The last time it came on the radio, I turned it up as loud as it would go and found myself at the feet of Jesus in my car on 635, I was crying by the time I got to the MacArthur exit, and not so sure why it was having such an impact. All I knew was that it brought back strong memories of my youth choir days.
As I was driving home from a consultation yesterday (9/9/11), “Forever” came across my radio again. I’ve had the memory of 9/11 on my mind a lot lately with the 10th anniversary coming up, so I had just been thinking about it before the song came on and that’s when it hit me – it was God’s promise to us for that day, and every day.
Forever God is FAITHFUL. Even when terrorists high jack American planes and use them as weapons in our own country, my God has a plan. Jeremiah 29:11 says, “For I know the plans I have for you, declares the Lord, plans to prosper you and not to harm you, plans to give you hope and a future.”
Forever God is STRONG. Even when we seem to be at the bottom of our rope and totally defeated, my God will sustain us. My God will rebuild us. Isaiah 41:13 says, “For I am the Lord your God who takes hold of your right hand and says to you, ‘Do not fear, I will help you.’”
Forever God is WITH US. Even when it seems as if the darkness has come upon us to stay, my God brings light into our world, and my God never leaves me. Deuteronomy 31:6 says, “Be strong and courageous. Do not be afraid or terrified because of them, for the Lord your God goes with you; He will never leave you nor forsake you.”
The second verse really sticks out to me in speaking about that day. I didn’t have a single doubt on the morning of 9/11 that my God is or was real, and when I laid down my head to go to sleep that night, I didn’t doubt him any less. The verse says, “From the rising to the setting sun, His love endures forever. By the grace of God we will carry on, His love endures forever.”
GOING BACK -
Our youth choir went back to New York City the summer after my senior year, in June of 2004, just three short (and very long) years later. I was anxious to get back there and see the difference. The difference couldn’t be missed – I can’t imagine that place being my home, or having gone to visit during the weeks and months following the attacks. The site of the towers was so bleak, it seemed like there was little hope as you stood there and saw the amount of debris and destruction that was still in place. It seemed like that part of the city could never be rebuilt.
During a trip in March of 2008 with my (now) husband and his family – which happened to be the trip when we got engaged – I found happiness again in the city. It seemed like life had gotten back to “New York City“ normal and the site of the towers had been cleared out even more. The rebuilding process had already started taking place. This time, I saw hope of a bright future and pride in a country that rebuilds in a better and stronger way any time it is attacked.
I visited again in March of 2010 with my husband’s family, this time as Mrs. Hammons! So many things had changed since my first trip in June of 2001. Nine years of growing and learning about the world and about myself. On this trip, we were able to visit the site of the towers and came across a storefront that had been designed as a preview site for the memorial that is being built.
It was so incredible to see the overall view of what so many people have developed to honor the victims of 9/11 (and those that fought in honor of that day), and I can not wait to visit again in October of this year to see the Freedom Tower (still under construction) and the two infinity pools that fill the holes of the two towers.
*Edit - 10/2011
Brad and I were able to take a quick weekend trip back to New York to celebrate my birthday (including tickets to see RENT), and we spent a morning down at Ground Zero. We walked through a portion of the museum that was opened until the full thing is up and running, we got to see the progress on the Freedom Tower, and we were able to visit the beautiful memorial fountains that sit at the locations of the fallen towers and have the names of each life that was lost etched into them. It was something I will never forget, and I (surprise, surprise) can't wait to go back again and see even more of the changes.
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